I have baby rabies again

[devilgrrl]

Dear Uterus:

Please stop telling the less logical parts of my brain that we need a baby RIGHT THE FUCK NOW. The object lodged in you, contrary to your beliefs, is not a biological clock. It's an IUD and it there to keep everyone's stupidity in check. Unless you and the ovaries plan on moving out and getting a well paying job to support this hypothetical baby,  we will not be having one for several years. I know babies are cute, but they eventual become evil, evil toddlers. I also understand pregnant bellies are awfully cute, especially on models and celebrites, but I am currently dealing with fat issues. A pregnant belly will not cure this. You could end up looking like Britney's uterus and how would you like that!?

Also, the conspiracy with my ovaries is not necessary. Just because they're happily functioning does not mean you need to. Cramping is also not a good way to convince me you need a baby. Cramps are in no way similar to hunger pangs; they are more akin to annoying whining.

Thank you for your cooperation in this matter,
Your Landlord

Comments

[batswing.livejournal.com]

lol

With you on that one!

[devilgrrl.livejournal.com]

The baby rabies are awful, aren't they?

[aliki.livejournal.com]

*laugh* This is exactly how I feel right now. My ovaries are telling me that I'm 26 years old and I've been married for 2 years, and since we want 2-3 kids, we should start soon since Bri turns 34 this year.

However, contrary to the wonderful "logic" of my ovaries, we're still $50K in student loan debt and I'm still a measly graduate student making a pitiance of money.

[devilgrrl.livejournal.com]

I bet there's some kind of uterine/ovarian consortium controlling this. I'm unemployed, in college, and Steven makes precious little as a substitute teacher.

Your husband is the same age as Steven is, though. Steven's birthday is in March.

[renfairewench.livejournal.com]

Those bonging gongs for me are just quiet dings every now and again. I did find a way to help me through the "I MUST HAVE A BABY NOW!" times though. It ususally included working in the nursery at church and going to visit my mom. She volunteered at a house called Open Arms. They always had babies. Generally those baby fixes helped. Sometimes though I still want one. I feel like I'm a failure in that regard, that I never did have a baby, even though every part of my brain says "buck up fool, you did the right thing", but there is this little voice that asks "did you really?"

[devilgrrl.livejournal.com]

A couple of our friends are having one, so I'm planning on getting my baby fixes from them. Damn biological clocks, though.

[angelwifey.livejournal.com]

babie rabies!!! haha:)

[devilgrrl.livejournal.com]

I think I need an icon for that.

[metalchick1000.livejournal.com]

heh. that's funny.
how 'bout this...fly out here and hang with my monsters for a couple days. i promise you, any iwannabemommy virus that you've caught will be cured.

[devilgrrl.livejournal.com]

Usually having my stepkid around cures it, but now it's just getting into the "I know I could do better." bit.

Maybe your three could cure it. I could use a vacation.

[nyhamsterhouse.livejournal.com]

Maybe it's cause I'm as single as they come, but I never seem to want a baby (yet), and I'm 28.

Or, maybe it's cause I have my hands completely full with 17 hamsters, and a guinea pig on the way....

[devilgrrl.livejournal.com]

I'd probably be better if we had pets. I'm betting the baby rabies is from coming off the Pill after a bunch of years.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

I totally know what you mean.

[devilgrrl.livejournal.com]

Everyone's got baby rabies, lately. I blame celebrities.

[plunkybug.livejournal.com]

I blame Spring, and society.