Oh, Cat

[devilgrrl]

I'm sitting here on the couch, chilling out, and suddenly, I hear nomming. So I look up and there's the cat, snarfing down something as quick as possible, because I so might steal it. I'm like that.

Now, I cleaned, so there is pretty much nothing on the floor. I'm all CAT, what the fuck are you eating? She scoots off, but before she does, I saw what was in her mouth.

She managed to find the one piece of kettle corn I had dropped. The one edible thing on the floor and she found it. It was, apparently, delicious.

Now that I've established that, I am realizing that Goddammit is both quiet and not where I can see her. This is generally Not Good. Not five seconds later, she comes parading out with one of my ponies in her mouth, which she somehow managed to get off of the doorknob.

What this boils down to is I am stand here, in my underwear, with one cat trying to get her head in my bag of popcorn and the other one about to eat a hair tie. I am trying to decide which one I should do something about. I decided that catching and removing a pony from the cat's bum later on was worse than the other one with the popcorn, so I go to grab her.

She runs, the other one grabs the popcorn and goes, and I'm still standing here, in my underwear, like an idiot.

And of course, soon as I sit down, there goes Goddammit parading by with a dirty band-aid in her mouth. Lather, rinse, repeat. I love that my cats pick trash, really.

Of course, there is a full bowl of fresh water and food that I put out less than an hour ago. But no, band-aids and ponies are so much better. Perhaps Madame would like some potty water to finish dinner off?

Comments

[call-me-ps.livejournal.com]

This made me LOL so hard I had to share it with my Mom because she wanted to know what was so funny.

She said, "She's a pretty good writer...she should send that to Reader's Digest". There you go. :-)

I freaking love your cat stories.

[wickedshadow.livejournal.com]

LOL, that's funny.

[stellalunatic.livejournal.com]

you're SURE they're not feral raccoons?

Sounds like one of mine - she's obsessed with licking tape. It's unhealthy!

[justsurvive.livejournal.com]

oh those silly kittys.
i never understand dogs eating used tissue either. dont they understand trash=gross??

[ladyluna.livejournal.com]

Oh yes, Ponies are The. Best. Thing. Ever. I have finally given up. They never actually try to eat them, they just like to bat them around at each other. Kitten Poof also enjoys straws. Buddy likes the sticky paper we use to get their hair off of us. Make it into a ball (sticky side facing in, obviously), and it's just so much fun.

Why do I have a hundred cat toys laying about when all they play with is random junk?

[lassie-faire.livejournal.com]

I love that you named your cat Goddammit. Whenever you post about her, I know i'm in for a treat (like mmm a tasty band-aid!). :D

This did not disappoint. :)

should've taken a picture!

[ccjohn.livejournal.com]

I like 'em both already.