how to cope...i don't know. there is now way you can feel 'better' or 'normal' again too soon because this is a tremendous loss for you. when Dad(my stepfather) died, i was 3 months pregnant and i was unsure of how to deal with the sadness. one of the things that upset me was that Dad would never meet my child. i had told him two weeks before on Father's Day and it was the last day he was able to really talk and understand us, and he was so happy for me. after he had passed, we all sat around him and cried for a bit and talked about what we'd miss about him. when i voiced my sadness about Dad not meeting Baby, my loving sister in law who is very strong in her faith leaned over and said "but Jenne, think about it - he's with your baby right now - in that place where you are before and after being here. He's met your baby even before you did!" it may sound cheesy to some but for some reason that helped me a lot. every time i think of her comforting words to me it brings tears to my eyes.The mourning was still there and i missed his sarcastic jokes and bright smile so much. But every time i felt myself getting very distraught, i thought of Jenny's words, and the belief she has and it brought to mind this picture of Dad holding a little baby in his arms and it always made me feel better.
i know that may not be any consolation but i felt the need to share it.
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Date: 2007-12-01 01:32 pm (UTC)when Dad(my stepfather) died, i was 3 months pregnant and i was unsure of how to deal with the sadness. one of the things that upset me was that Dad would never meet my child. i had told him two weeks before on Father's Day and it was the last day he was able to really talk and understand us, and he was so happy for me. after he had passed, we all sat around him and cried for a bit and talked about what we'd miss about him. when i voiced my sadness about Dad not meeting Baby, my loving sister in law who is very strong in her faith leaned over and said "but Jenne, think about it - he's with your baby right now - in that place where you are before and after being here. He's met your baby even before you did!" it may sound cheesy to some but for some reason that helped me a lot. every time i think of her comforting words to me it brings tears to my eyes.The mourning was still there and i missed his sarcastic jokes and bright smile so much. But every time i felt myself getting very distraught, i thought of Jenny's words, and the belief she has and it brought to mind this picture of Dad holding a little baby in his arms and it always made me feel better.
i know that may not be any consolation but i felt the need to share it.